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Tag: child

  • Footballer, Ighalo, wife trade words on social media

    Footballer, Ighalo, wife trade words on social media

    Popular footballer, Jude Ighalo, has reacted to a series of claims leveled against him by his wife, Sonia, who took to her Instagram account on Friday night to accuse him of being a womanizer.

    Trouble started brewing when Sonia took to her Instastory to congratulate him on the birth of his baby from another woman.

    Sonia in her post revealed said the footballer has fathered two children now from two different women adding that she still remains his legal wife.

    This is coming months after reports emerged that the duo were having issues in their marriage due to alleged infidelity from the footballer.

    Sonia also deleted their photographs from her Instagram page and the couple have not been seen together since then and have neither shared each other’s photos.

    They also stopped wearing their wedding bands.

    However, Sonia took to her Instagram account on Friday to state that the footballer has welcomed another child outside their matrimonial home.

    She congratulated him on the birth of his new baby from another woman.

    Shortly after her post was shared, trolls took to her comment section to say that she called him out on IG because she is pained that he has moved on and also found someone better.

    In her response, Sonia pointed out that she is the legally married wife and that if she wants to collect everything from him, she can.

    The mum of three alleged that Jude welcomed a baby with another woman since February and has refused to pay child support despite court orders.

    Reacting, the footballer in a post via his Instagram account on Saturday morning stated that “no one can bring a good man down.”

    According to him, who God has blessed no one can curse.

    “You can never bring a good man down. who God has blessed no one can curse. It’s too late to fail,” he wrote.

     

  • Having a child has changed me – Simi

    Having a child has changed me – Simi

    Popular Nigerian songstress, Simi has revealed how having a child has changed her life.

    Simi, who got married to Adekunle Gold in a private wedding ceremony in 2019, welcomed her daughter in June 2020.

    In a video shared on her Instagram story, the 33-year-old said that having a daughter has made her have more compassion.

    According to her, before having a child she queried parents who could not control their kids in public places but that has changed.

    Simi said: “Having a kid has really changed me in different ways. Before I gave birth, when I see kids running around in public places I wonder why the parents cannot control them but raising a kid now has given me more empathy.

    “It has made me realise it is not really about me and I have developed more empathy.”

    In March 2019, Simi disclosed that she would be releasing her third studio album Omo Charlie Champagne, Vol. 1 to coincide with her birthday on April 19, 2019. She disclosed this information in a series of social media messages. The album is a slight departure from the relatively afro-centric feel of Simisola .It is a mixture of sentimental ballad, Afropop, Afro-fusion, Afro-soul, R&B, EDM and moombahton.

    The 13-track album features guest vocals from Patoranking, Maleek Berry, Falz, and her husband Adekunle Gold.

  • Okowa orders investigation into death of mother, child in Warri

    Okowa orders investigation into death of mother, child in Warri

    Delta State Governor, Ifeanyi Okowa has ordered an immediate investigation into the death of a woman and her daughter in Warri on Wednesday.

    The governor gave the order in a statement by his Chief Press Secretary, Mr. Olisa Ifeajika, in Asaba.

    He decried the incident and charged police authorities in the state to commence an urgent and accelerated investigation into the circumstances surrounding the losses.

    According to Okowa, the sad news of the death of a woman and her daughter in a rather bizarre circumstance in Warri on Wednesday is quite unfortunate and disheartening.

    He condoled with the deceased family on the loss of their loved ones and assured them that everyone involved in the processes that led to the incident would be brought to book.

    Okowa called on the people, especially the people of Warri, to remain calm and law-abiding, and allow the government and law enforcement agencies to take necessary steps to address the situation.

    The governor also charged the police to ensure that law and order prevailed in the area.

  • Craze Clown, fiancée welcome child

    Craze Clown, fiancée welcome child

    Nigerian comedian Craze Clown and Jojo, his fiancée, have welcomed their first child, a baby girl together.

    The comedian broke the good news in a creative Christmas video shared on his Instagram page on Sunday night.

    In the post accompanying the video, Craze Crown described the baby as his best Christmas as well as birthday gift ever.

    The comedian also celebrated his fiancée for gifting him a beautiful baby during the festive season.

    “Compliment of the season guys. My Daughter says hi. The real journey begins. Best Christmas/birthday gift ever my wife gave me the most beautiful princess,” he wrote.

    The baby’s arrival comes days after the comedian celebrated his birthday.

    It also comes about a year after the entertainer announced his engagement to Jojo, his girlfriend of eight years.

    Crazy Clown made the headlines in October over his involvement in a car crash on Jojo’s birthday.

    “Somebody died in this accident. I saw my life flash before my eyes. I already accepted my fate but God said no. This song says everything for me. Thank you Jesus,” he had said.

    “Thank you to everyone reaching, I’m okay, just a dislocated wrist, neck and bruises but I’m alive.”

     

  • Supreme Court’s Judgment on Igbo female child’s right to inheritance: Why are the females not celebrating? – Ozioma Onyenweaku

    Supreme Court’s Judgment on Igbo female child’s right to inheritance: Why are the females not celebrating? – Ozioma Onyenweaku

    Ozioma Onyenweaku

    It had been a long standing tradition of the Igbos that a female child was not entitled to inherit from her father’s property. The reason had always been that as a woman she was married or would be married into another family; ‘let her go to her husband’s house that’s where her inheritance is.’

    Then on getting to her husband’s house, she could only be recognized as having gained root in the family if she had a male child; that, of course, is why she could be entitled to anything property.

    In actual fact, she would inherit nothing because inheritance belonged to male children of the deceased. And she had her God to thank for having the male children because she would have been driven out of her late husband’s house if she did not get the male child.

    Then boom! The Supreme court of Nigeria!! The apex court of the land declared that customary law null and void, and of no effect; and held:
    “— the Igbo customary law which disentitles a female child from partaking in the sharing of her deceased father’s estate is a breach of Section 42(1) and (2) of the constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria, a fundamental rights provision guaranteed to every Nigerian — It is discriminatory… Discriminatory customary law is void as it conflicts with section 42(1) and (2) of the Constitution“

    The Court went further to state, “No matter the circumstances of the birth of a female child, such a child is entitled to an inheritance from her late father’s estate”

    It all started with a case instituted by Gladys Ada Ukeje, the daughter of one late Lazarus Ogbonna Ukeje challenging her being prohibited from sharing in the property of her late father. She was being excluded from the sharing in her late father’s property based on the Igbo’s long standing customary law.

    This judgment elicited a lot of reactions from many quarters particularly from those who find the judgment unacceptable. The negative reactions are not unexpected because the customary law so thrashed had been upheld in Igboland for ages.

    The Ukeje’s case with the subsequent Supreme Court historic Judgment has give not just Gladys Ukeje but all Igbo female children the right to inherit from their late father’s property.

    Now, here is my grouse: I was expecting the women to roll out the drums. To celebrate! No! Four years down the line many women are not even aware of this judgment. Even those who are aware are probably too overwhelmed (or is it too scared?) to celebrate. I expected the jubilation and celebration to be everywhere, and too great not to be noticed. I know what we women can do!

    I expected the leaders of the various women groups in Igbo land to educate and sensitize their members of this shackle that has been broken and dismantled.

    It pains me that many women are allowing the negative reactions of some male folks to be their reality.

    I was a speaker in one women forum, and I used the opportunity to discuss this landmark judgment of Supreme Court. I remember hearing a woman in the background asking, “Will it work?” I got weak.

    Will what work? Who makes what work? Women, a fellow woman has courageously cleared a path for you, why are you afraid of walking on that path? Could it be the effect of the age-long shackle?

    Are you also aware that the Supreme has also pronounced against custom that required a widow who had no male child to vacate her husband’s house because the property traditionally would go to the deceased’s father, and brother?

    The Supreme Court had this to say,

    “… A custom of this nature in the 21st century societal setting will only tend to depict the absence of realities of human civilization. It is punitive, uncivilized and only intended to protect selfish perpetration of male dominance which is aimed at suppressing the right of women folk in the given society …any culture that disinherits a daughter from her father’s estate or wife from her husband’s property should be punitively dealt with… for a widow of a man to be thrown out of her matrimonial home where she had lived all her life with her late husband and children, by her late husband’s brothers on the ground that she had no male child is indeed very barbaric …”

    Great! Awesome!!

    This is calling on all women leaders to please spread this good news among your different groups. We are ready to give support to women on any report of any denied right to inheritance.

    Meanwhile, roll out the drums! Let’s celebrate!! The awesome Igbo females!!

  • Agbani Darego, hubby welcome 2nd child

    Agbani Darego, hubby welcome 2nd child

    Popular beauty queen, Agbani Darego and her husband Ishaya Danjuma have welcomed their second together.

    The former Miss World took to her Instagram page on Friday, December 4, 2020, where she announced the news in a concealed style.

     

    After sharing the good news, her friends including, Dakore Egbuson-Akande, Munachi Abii, and Idia Aisien all took to her comment section to congratulate her on the arrival of her child.

    In 2001, Darego was crowned Most Beautiful Girl in Nigeria. Contrary to popular belief, Darego did not replace Valerie Peterside after the latter was dethroned as she had competed in rival pageant Miss Nigeria. A few months later she was a contestant at Miss Universe, and became the first Nigerian to place among the top 10 semi-finalists, finishing seventh overall. She was the only top ten contestant to wear a modest maillot as opposed to a revealing bikini during the swimsuit competition.

    In November that year, she became the first indigenous African to claim the Miss World title (Past African winners Penelope Coelen and Anneline Kriel from South Africa, are of European descent, and Antigone Costanda, who represented Egypt in 1954 is of Greek heritage). Darego’s victory was widely welcomed in her home country, and her one-year tenure included goodwill trips and scheduled appearances on behalf of the pageant, and a national honour of MFR.

     

  • Child sexual molester’s mode of operation – Ozioma Onyenweaku

    Child sexual molester’s mode of operation – Ozioma Onyenweaku

    By Ozioma Onyenweaku

    We shall be in a better position to protect our children if we know the strategies and tactics that the child sexual molesters use. You must note that the thought of sexually molesting a child does not begin and end one day. It is usually a well thought out gradual process. The process starts with first identifying a vulnerable child, and then a gradual seduction of the child.

    Let’s look at the identified steps of a child molester: First, the molester identifies and picks his target. How does he pick his target? He looks out for a child who is vulnerable; one who will be easy to deceive. A child who is too trusting and overly obedient is very vulnerable and a target for the molester. When he has picked his target, he moves to the second step.

    The second step is the stage where the molester would start giving special attention to the child. The molester would pretend to genuinely care for the child, and the child’s welfare. The molester could even start giving special gifts to the child while revealing no ulterior motive.

    The molester cashes in on the fact that children appreciate and love anyone who spends time and plays with them; so he makes out time to be and play with the child. The plays at this stage are clean and innocent. At this stage, the molester works hard to gain the confidence of the child and the family.

    He would prove himself a ‘good’ friend of the family. Members of the child’s family may have started referring to the molester as the child’s friend or bestie. Many times you could have heard some people calling out to their child, “Come o! Your friend is here”; and that ‘friend’ could just be anyone who could be working hard to gain the confidence and trust of the family with a view to sexually molest the child.

    When the child is sick, the ‘friend’ (the molester) could even volunteer to take the child to the hospital or school.

    Having gained the confidence of the child and the family, the molester would start isolating the child from his siblings. He might decide to go playing ball or visiting a cinema alone with ‘his friend’. Sure-footed now, having gained the confidence of the child and the family, the molester would start grooming the child for the real abuse. He would gradually do that by becoming more physical with the child. He could tickle the child in certain parts of the body and asking the child to do same to him in return.

    Knowing that children are not good in keeping secret, the molester would move to the stage of training the child in secret-keeping. This would prepare the child to keep it secret when he would eventually molest the child. This, he would do by telling the child to keep innocent minor things secret; such things as the ice-cream he bought for the child or the beach they plan to visit. He would put it in such a way that the child would see everything as fun. The child would begin to keep such ‘harmless’ secrets, and finding much delight in them.

    Having taken the above steps, the molester would have gained the trust of the child and those of all involved in the life of the child. To everyone around, the child would seem safe and protected in the ‘loving care’ of the molester. So the stage would now be set for the attack.

    The attack itself could be subtle. He could first invite the child to freely touch his genital while he in turn fondles or fingers the child’s genital. He could even start with drama. One molester confessed that his style was to put on porn video, and make the child sit next to him or on his laps; that way, the abuse would follow naturally. So the molester strikes! And the child is defiled! The molester moves over to the cover up stage.

    The molester would demand that the child kept it secret. The child could be warned to keep it secret otherwise she would die. The molester could also threaten to kill the child’s parents should the child tell anyone. Using blackmail, the molester ensures the abuse goes on for quite a time until discovered or revealed. Most abuses do not end on the first attempt.

    So vigilance is what we need to curtail child sexual abuse; and we cannot err on the side of vigilance.

  • Creating a safe home for the children – Ozioma Onyeweaku

    Creating a safe home for the children – Ozioma Onyeweaku

    By Ozioma Onyeweaku

    It is no longer news that greater number of sexual abuses happen in the homes. We all weep at the fact that the homes are no longer safe for the children. One other case of serious concern going on in homes is sibling incest.

    This happens where an older or more powerful child bullies or seduces the younger or weaker sister or brother into sexual acts. This, I must tell you, is on the increase; more so with the effect of internet.

    Many children have access to nasty sites on internet where they are exposed to sexual acts. These children, after watching the ugly sites, tend to turn to their siblings to practice what they have seen on those sites. This is in addition to all other incest that go on in the family with uncles, fathers, cousins and so on.

    Another frightening one is where house helps, as a way of getting back at their employers would force the children to engage in sexual acts with one another. One such instance was brought to my attention where a house help, a young man, made the children of his master to engage in all manner of sexual act with themselves.

    He had the whole episodes recorded. He turned around using the videos he had made of them to blackmail them. It was later discovered that he was having his way with the underage girl. The girl’s siblings were forced to keep quiet to avoid him releasing the videos to their parents. Imagine the agony of the children and their parents.

    It is said that prevention is better than cure. Some situations don’t even have a cure thereby making prevention the only option. Child sexual abuse is one of those situations that we must prevent as there is no cure. Once the damage is done, it is done.

    Creating and maintaining a safe home environment is a sure practical way of safeguarding the children from sexual abuse.

    One good way of starting off creating a safe home is by creating a loving family with open lines of communication. A family where members treat one another with love, kindness, respect and dignity; and everyone is there for the other. Such a home inculcates true values to the children, and does away with traditional notions of masculinity which gives boys the idea that they can take what they want, and when they want it. Both sexes are raised with a balance view of each other. No superior. No inferior. A home where there is constant and loving communication, every member, particularly children, feels very free to speak from the heart. When a member is hurt outside he or she runs quickly home knowing that he or she would get sympathy, support and care from the home.

    It is difficult to convince a child from such a home to keep secret from the parents.

    To create a safe home, parents must be involved in the affairs of their children. Monitor what they do; and provide safeguards in the areas of TV and internet. Relationships are defined, and limits drawn.

    To further create a safe home, I always recommend this practice session for the family:

    The scenario to paint for your girl for the practice session:

    Let’s say, Rose is a 7-year old girl. Her favourite uncle comes visiting. Rose mother has gone to the market. Rose is alone with this her uncle that she is very fond of. While alone with Rose, the uncle tries touching Rose’ private part. What do you think Rose should do to keep safe? If you were Rose what would you do?

    Then demonstrate for her how she can boldly say “No! don’t touch me!”, and how to run away while screaming. Let the children demonstrate the escape route several times.

    Every member of the family and all in the family, both males and females, should be present and participate in this practice session each time it holds. The benefit of having everyone in the family present at the practice session is that by participating, all in the family are assuring the children that they too are concerned about their safety; and that they will not molest them. And should anyone in the family attempt to molest, the child will be quick to remind the person of the practice session. Try it today.

  • Browny Igboegwu, wife, welcome baby girl after ten years of marriage

    Browny Igboegwu, wife, welcome baby girl after ten years of marriage

    Nollywood actor Browny Igboegwu and his wife, Becky, have welcomed a child after 10 years of marriage.

     

    The actor took to his Instagram page to share some of his bitter experiences while they were still expecting a baby.

     

    He wrote: ”This took 10years to come who can battle with the Lord, I say nobody. I don’t know about you. Where are the so called witches and wizards. It can only be God”.

     

    Browny also noted that people urged him to get another wife, when they couldn’t conceive.

     

    “Get another wife time no dey, age is no longer on her side, find a girl and give belle at least time no dey ooo, Browny hmmmm you dey try for how long you go wait, oya adopt baby first as you dey wait, all these Asaba girls who knows what she has done that she can’t conceive, hmmmm is it by buying new car? Let him born naaa, you no go understand bc you never born, don’t worry when you born you will understand, I love this couple you will never know they don’t have a child, God help them even if it’s one, your children must be up to four now it’s been long you got married.” All these and so many others were the words from people’s mouth, you can imagine how I felt all these while hearing all these from both people who feel my pain and those who mock me. I silently took it to God in prayer and today, my wife and I have reason to say thank you lord”.

     

     

  • Adisa Oluwafunmilola and the drowning of her baby: Looking beyond shadows – Ozioma Onyeweaku

    Adisa Oluwafunmilola and the drowning of her baby: Looking beyond shadows – Ozioma Onyeweaku

    By Ozioma Onyeweaku

    Recently, the story of Adisa Oluwafunmilola who drowned her baby girl of one year and nine months old in a bucket of water has elicited a lot of reactions from many people. While quite a few have pitied her, many have called her names, and called for her head.

    “She is heartless”; “She is wicked!” “May she rot in jail” “She does not deserve to be called a woman” I was shedding tears as I watched the interview of Adisa Oluwafunmilola (22). As I listened to her in that interview I wept as I could see the monster that snatched away Baby Adisa, and denied Oluwafunmilola the fruits of her endured labour.

    This is a monster that lurks around so fiercely and gaining momentum by the day in our country with no one taking note. No one is being educated about it. It is ignored as if it is not even there. Yet it rages on.

    World Health Organization, WHO, says that 20% of mothers in developing countries encounter this monster after childbirth; and a study says that there are more than 1.5 million cases of it per year in Nigeria. It is Postpartum Depression.

    How many of us are aware of it? Postpartum depression is said to be a depression that occurs after childbirth.

    Signs or symptoms of Postpartum Depression include loss of appetite, intense irritability, depressed mood, loss of pleasure, feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and helplessness, and difficulty bonding with the baby, and more particularly, thoughts of death, suicide or thoughts of hurting oneself or someone else.

    Within the postpartum depression is a more serious depression called Postpartum Psychosis. It is a very serious illness that can affect new mothers; it can happen quickly, more often within the first three months of childbirth.

    The sufferer can lose touch with reality, could start having auditory hallucinations, and having a feeling of agitation and anger; could start having strange feelings and behaviours such as thoughts of killing her baby or herself.

    And the medical advice is that a new mother should, as a matter of urgency, be taken to hospital for professional assistance once she starts having thoughts of harming herself or her baby. Research shows the following to be at the risk of having postpartum depression: 1.

    Those with history of depression prior to becoming pregnant, or during pregnancy 2. Those having a history of depression or premenstrual dysphoric disorder 3. Those with limited social support 4. Those who live alone 5. Those having marital conflict 6. Young age at time of pregnancy; the younger, the higher the risk.

    Looking at the factors that can increase the risk of PPD, one can see clearly that Adisa Oluwafunmilola is a good candidate for postpartum depression. She had relationship issue having been denied and abandoned by the man that impregnated her; with no financial power, missing her admission, having social condemnation rather than social support, and being barely 19 years of age at time of pregnancy; all these groomed her for postpartum psychosis.

    When Funmilola kept telling her sister that she was going to kill her baby, if Oluwafunmilola’s sister, and all their family relations and their pastor she called knew about postpartum depression, they would have discharged the only duty they owed Oluwafunmilola at that time, which was rushing her to the hospital for professional assistance. Usually, postpartum patients are kept away in the hospital because of risk of hurting themselves or someone else particularly their baby.

    There is insignificant awareness of this problem called postpartum depression among the Nigerian populace. Postpartum depression is treatable and can be managed, and harm and death prevented if properly diagnosed on time. Like World Health Organization, WHO, recommends, with each postnatal visit, mothers should be asked about their emotional wellbeing, what family and social support they have and what strategies they have in place for dealing with day-to-day matters given the stress level in our system.

    There is urgent need to sensitize the populace on issue of postpartum depression and its management. This is, therefore, a call for health institutions and health caregivers to make postpartum care of new mothers a priority; and for such care to be readily available in order to always ascertain the psychological wellbeing of the new mothers with a view to assessing factors in their environment that can trigger postpartum depression among them. We already, generally, have enough factors right on ground now to trigger depression in anyone at anytime; more reason we need to pay particular and special attention to new mothers. I feel your pains Adisa Oluwafunmilola. I grieve with you.